FIRE!!!

It’s been one of those weeks. You know what I mean. I’m so busy, I don’t know if I’m coming or going. My days are blurring together.  The rest of the world tells me it’s Wednesday. My mind isn’t registering days. I’m vaguely aware of the hours in the day only because I know I have to be at work. The only thing getting me thru the day is this single word, lunch. The blissful hour of silence, nourishment, and no work.

After lunch well, unfortunately only children get a snack time. I personally think that adults should get a snack time too. Just think of how much happier the work environment would be with a snack time.

My bad, I digress. So, anyway back to my point.

So, it’s Wednesday. I’m in the restroom. This is another small but fleeting moment of blissful silence. I’m in the restroom stall. I’m staring at the tiled floor, taking care of business, in my own little world. I leave my blissful little world and come back to reality. I look down to see an accidental wardrobe malfunction. It seems that I was in such a rush this morning, that I put on my panties inside out…

Yes, I did it. Ladies everywhere have. I’m just admitting to it out loud. It was a whoops moment. But that’s to give you an idea of how busy and boggled my mind was.

Then I realized I seriously need a vacation. But thankfully there is a bright light at the end of the tunnel. I’ve got plans with my girlfriend at the end of the week. She’s invited me up to attend the opera with her. She has season passes.

Friday, I leave work at a decent time. I actually make it thru airport security without issue. No random checks, hooray! But there’s a small catch. It’s the opera, so I can’t wear a cute cocktail dress and heels. It’s a formal occasion. I got dressed in the bathroom at work.

I’m wearing a sleeveless black lace with nude undertones gown, in a trumpet silhouette, high neck line, but plunging open back. My shoes are black patent leather heels. My hair is up in a chignon, with dramatic eye makeup, and red glossy lip to complete the look. I look like I’m going to a high end photo shoot.

I look damn sexy, if I do say so myself.

My beautiful bejeweled red clutch is in my small carry on bag. I thought carrying that thru the airport might be a bit much.

Remember I made it thru the airport with NO problems. But my dear readers let me inform you that walking thru the airport in formal wear was an interesting experience. I received multiple interesting/jealous looks from women. What happened to girl power I ask you? Basically, almost every man that saw me looked at me like I was dessert. I had to take off my shoes for security. I was wearing a trumpet gown. So I had to pick up my dress to walk thru without my shoes. I swear the TSA agent was looking at me like I was crazy. Ha! I’m honestly surprised they didn’t check me.

I thought about going to Starbucks to get my beloved elixir of life while sitting and waiting for boarding. But I’m sure that standing in formal wear while drinking coffee would have caused even more stares. So, I sat and struggled without.

I made it thru the flight. We de plane, I grab a cab. I’m NOT receiving any strange looks here, it’s New York. They have a naked cowboy in Times Square. Formal wear is tame here.

I’m on the way to my friends place. I call, no answer. But it’s not a problem I know where she keeps her spare key. I pull up, all seems normal. It doesn’t phase me. I ring the doorbell, no reply. Not a problem, I just let myself in.

I walk inside, I immediately hear the fire alarm going off and I smell food burning. I automatically think the worse. Oh my god, is she passed out in the kitchen from smoke inhalation. My instincts kick in, I take off my heels, prepared for action! I think find a fire extinguisher, call 911, grab a blanket, etc.

I rush into the kitchen, my first sight is a well toned tight ass. The tight ass is attached to a gorgeous man who is thrusting into my girlfriend on the kitchen counter. There’s food all over the floor and smoke is everywhere. But this has not phased them! She’s screaming, “Harder! Harder!” All while beating him with a wooden spoon. Kitchen utensils have apparently many different uses, who knew?

I’m at a loss for words, I try to back out of the kitchen. That’s when she notices me in the doorway.

Awkward…..

She has a shocked look on her face, but they continue the session. I decided to leave the room. Sit patiently and wait for them to finish up. Then the gorgeous man is walking into the living  room, holding a kitchen towel over his private area that says, wine or hot men. Did I forget to mention that I gave her that towel for Christmas? I’m glad it went to good use. She took the saying a little bit more literally than I had anticipated.

After finishing the session, my girlfriend comes out and ask me what am I doing here? She asks if I’m alright? She’s happy to see me. But what’s going on?

I point to my formal attire and reply did you forget? I’m here for the opera. This hair, makeup, and dress happened for a reason. I didn’t just stroll in to watch you fuck that incredibly gorgeous toned man against the kitchen counter.

She looks at me, shakes her head, and smiles. She tells me, “Girl, the opera is next weekend.” well fucking hell!  Well at least I got to see a show, just not the one show I had anticipated.

Thought: What would have happened if I had given her a different kitchen towel for Christmas?

© 2016 southerngabunny